Last month, I was asked to write up my success story for the program that I got clean at. I truly felt honored that they asked me. The reason that Jamie needed a success story is because she is trying to get funding from a charity for Maple House. So here goes...
I started smoking speed and weed on a daily basis in 1998. I was 21 years old. My family wanted nothing to do with me. I was arrested for the first time in 1998 on a possession charge and ordered to do drug diversion. I failed to do these classes. Needless to say, I had a warrant for my arrest. By this time my addiction was so bad that I did not care. In December of 1999, I committed my first felony offense. I was charged with burglary for cashing a stolen check. Again, I was arrested and ordered to do Work Release. Again, I failed to follow through. This seems like a pattern, doesn't it? In 2000 I found out that I was pregnant because I was throwing up every time I tried to get high. (This must have been a sign!) For some reason, this was the only time I was able to stop doing drugs for any amount of time. I gave birth to my son in September of 2000. By the time my son was 2 months old, I was back to my obsession with drugs. I felt that I was a "good" mom because I left my son with his grandmother. My son was 9 months old when the police finally caught up with me. I was driving down the street with my son and his dad when the police pulled me over for out of date registration. My son got to see his mom and dad handcuffed and taken away from him. You would think that this would be enough for me to say "enough is enough!" It wasn't. I served about 70 days in county jail. I was released on the promise that I would complete 150 community service hours.
I started these hours. Then I got high. Then I got busted again for felony possession. I was very lucky to have been ordered to Prop 36. (Court ordered drug treatment.) I was struggling to stay clean. I decided to do outpatient at Cedar House because word on the street was that they did not drug test very often. Boy, was I wrong!! About 3 weeks in, I was asked to drug test. I obviously was under the influence of speed. I got very scared. I went to probation officer and told on myself. This would be my third violation of probation. My P.O. simply told me that he would take my child into CPS custody and send me to prison if I continued to use. I said, "You cannot take my child." and he said, "Watch me." So I surrendered for the first time in my life and I said I am WILLING to do whatever you want me to do. He made a few calls and I ended up in detox at Cedar House on 11/13/02. Two days later, Miss Jamie came down to Cedar House to take me and my 2 year old boy over to our new home.
When I arrived at Maple House, I was very skeptical. I had no clue how to be a mother. I had absolutely no parenting skills. I had no idea what it meant to be responsible or what structure was. My son was not used to being with me either.
I learned so much at Maple House. I learned how to be consistent with my son. The staff helped me so much in training me how to have effective parenting skills. I learned how to be responsible for my own actions and to clean up after myself. I developed relationships with the women and the staff that I still treasure. The groups helped me to see that I wasn't alone in my struggles to stay clean. I feel that the structure of the program is what helped me to understand the importance of staying on time. Some of the things that I was required to do during my stay seemed to be futile at the time, however I now see that everything had its purpose. The program is designed to prepare us for the real world. As mothers, we need to be able to multi task because our kids need us. We need to be able to figure out how to schedule appointments for ourselves and our children with out effecting other normal daily activities such as work/school/groups. My stay at Maple House was 7 months. Originally, I was prepared for a 30 day dry out to get my P.O. off my back. Somewhere in that time, something changed my mind. I realized that I liked being 'normal.' I loved being a mother to my son. I feel that it was crucial for my son to be there with me because I gained a bond with him that I will be forever grateful for. I was afraid to leave the safety of Maple House. I decided to stay for the entire 6 months. I began planning my 'new' life. I was enrolled in an aftercare/outpatient program in my last few months at Maple House in order to transition me into my sober living apartment.
I stayed the 7th month because my apartment was not ready yet. If I would have left 1 month before the apt was ready, I would have risked going back to old places that I need not be.
I use everything that I learned at Maple House on a daily basis even today. From parenting skills to acceptance.
I began working at Cedar House in October 2003. I worked there for 3 years and moved on to expand my horizons. Cedar House is a "Great Place to Start!"
Today I have been clean for 5 years and 4 months. I will be graduating from San Bernardino Valley College with an AA in Human Services and my certificate for Drug/Alcohol Studies in May 2008. I work full time as a Case Manager for dependency drug court. I work with women and men that have lost their children to CPS due to drug use. My goal is to continue my education at Cal State San Bernardino to obtain my BSW and become a Social Worker.
I never thought I was capable to be who I am today. I pay all my bills on time. I live in my own 2 bedroom apt in Riverside. (Just me and my son!) I bought a brand new car 2 years ago and have never been late on my payment! These are little things to some people, but huge for me.
I will be forever grateful for the opportunity to learn from all the staff at Maple House. If it weren't for that program I would not be where I am today. A happy parent!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
Almost 7 months since your last post, but well worth waiting for, Steph. You have no idea how proud of you we are. We love you and know you can achieve everything you set out to do. Your dad said he would send you pictures of the snow...I think you still check in on my blog every once in awhile, just look for pictures with a lot of white stuff.
I'm so glad you're back. I've often thought of you and wanted to let you know how much you helped me understand what our daughter was going through. You have a wonderful success story and a lot to be proud of. And your sweet Anthoney is even more handsome!
Post a Comment