My Story (Part 1)

I grew up living with a very protective and religious mother. I remember that the only time I had some sort of normal childhood was every other weekend and every other holiday. Those were the times that I would visit my dad.
I ended up moving to my dad's house in the summer before my sophomore year...
I was able to learn so many life skills that I would not have learned had I stayed with my mother. I was taught how to be responsible and how to work for what I want in life. I may not have used it back then, but I am using it now. Things were good at first, until I started to resort back to my old way of being sneaky. (The way I had to deal with the over protective, religious mother.) I didn't realize that I did not have to act that way anymore. Did I ever screw up!
I started to hang out with that guy that everyone warned me about. Did I mention he was the 'forbidden one?' So, naturally he was the one I wanted.
Needless to say, I started to do stupid things. Lying, Ditching school, forging notes to excuse absences. Did I mention, Lying? I started to smoke cigarettes because it was 'cool.' Isn't it??
I was not too much into smoking pot at that time (yet). I did my first line of speed in the P.E. locker room in 10th grade. I really did not like how it made me feel. HMMMMMM... I wonder why I did it again????? My addiction progressed slowly over time.
I did not go to prom or attend graduation with my class. At the time I had a 'who gives a sh*#' attitude.
Someone once sat me down and told me that when I get older, I will have some regrets. At the time I didn't see the importance of these events. That person was sooo very right. For the last 4 years that I have been sober, I have gotten really sad around this time of the year. All the congrats grad makes me have a feeling of emptiness in the pit of my stomach. I realize now that I attended school for 12 years (usually with an A average) and I did not allow myself to be recognized for that accomplishment. All because I wanted to fart around my senior year and ditch 5th period (ecomomics) and fail the class. Yeah, I had to go back to summer school just to get my diploma. What a dumb ass...
After high school, I was given a choice.... Go to college or leave with the 'loser.' 3 guesses on what my choice was....
So I ended up homeless with the loser until his girlfriend got mad....
Then I moved back to Norco. My brother took me in for a while...... until I started lying and seeing the loser and using again.... did I mention lying??? Wait a minute, I never stopped using; I was not using every day (yet.) So far I had burned 3 bridges; Dad, stepmom, & brother. Who was next? Mom.

Finally Friday

Thank God it's Friday. What a week. It actually went by pretty quickly. I had to call in a referral on a girl today for not doing what is required. I hate to do it, but these women know that their families are at risk.... Our goal is to keep these families together, but they have to do their part as well...
So this weekend is AnthonEy's last soccer game. I believe that he will get a trophy... He will be sooooo excited. Yeah, more excited than when he got the principal's award. That's it for tonight, I am off to the gym to sweat my a#% off.

Proud Parent

My son earned an award today!!!! The reason for the award is because in the last 2 months, Anthoney has improved so much that the teacher felt the Principal's Award was very appropriate. I am so proud of my little boy. Look at his face. He acted like this was just another day and just another award. I know he was excited but he is 6 years old and has to keep up his COOL reputation..... I think my dad is more excited than anyone!!! I just wish h was here to share this experience with me. I remember when I was a kid, my dad would take that hour drive for EVERY awards assembly so he could be there to see me succeed. I will always remember those days. So here I am excited that MY child earned an award and I was able to be there to see it. I really think that this gave him the reinforcement that he needs to know that everybody sees how much he has improved.